Hi Ganb8te,

I think you know that Toots and Lisa are right on this in that emailing your friend is going to do much good for your frame of mind and might make your friend feel uncomfortable. On an international diplomacy equivalent front it would be like Australia asking the USA what the UK is up to (which is a question that we in the UK regularly ask)

If it helps run through all the permutations of what they might say from the 'he's just confused' through to the 'he's decided that he is going to live in mountains wearing a flamingo umbrella for a hat and insists he is one fith unicorn'

which of these would help you? how would they help you?

Originally Posted By: ganb8te

I'm just starting to go a bit stir crazy with the lack of movement on my sitch and what that means for me (do I commit to those last 10 years or don't I).


I get that, things arent the same for me obviously but i can imagine how frustrating that would feel. But would you really rather have some of the developments that are happening in other situations?

Originally Posted By: ganb8te
He either beats me to the finish line or he doesn't.


What do you see as the finish line? and do you see it as a race? (i've unsurprisingly got my own thoughts on this but I'd like to know yours)

Originally Posted By: ganb8te
I feel like this could go on indefinitely...and I'm not ok with that.


So what are you going to do about it?

You can GAL like crazy but are you GAL'g to feel the time until your H makes a decision or comes back? or are you GAL'g to mean that you have movement in your life as whole and to find meaning and happiness that you most definitely deserve?

Ignoring H for a second, what are your goals and what can you plan to do that gives you something to look forward to with genuine excitment and no apprehension?



Sorry just realised i've kind of bombarded you with lots of questions

Last edited by jim0987; 02/02/15 10:04 AM.

Both mid 30s, 2 young kids
BD 7sep14
XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1
D paperwork in progress