Ganb8te 4 - Putting on my giraffe ears

[gan]

Thanks Toots and Lisa, and welcome Toots (don't think you've posted here before).

You ask a good question (Why do i need something more to keep me going?) This is what I posted on Lisa's thread earlier today which goes a little way to explaining how I feel at the moment:

It's 8 months separation to the day for me (so ~9 months post BD). I just feel like I've hit a wall and need some clarity. Things are coming to a head on many other people's threads that I've been keeping track of since I joined (Maybell, Ss, Calibri, Mozza). As for my own sitch, I feel like this could go on indefinitely...and I'm not ok with that.
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I feel like all that's left for me to do is move on and make myself be ok with the prospect of dating. Once that happens I feel like it is game over for H. He either beats me to the finish line or he doesn't.

While I appreciate fully than many (most) here have gone through the pain of finding out stuff through friends, FB etc....I on the other hand feel like I am living in a vacuum. I have nothing external to my own thoughts and feelings that help me know what is going on and the scope of what I am trying to heal from. It would be useful to have more information before going those last 10 yards.

GAL is not a problem for me - lots going on - and generally I don't worry about what he's up to. Haven't got enough to go on! I'm just starting to go a bit stir crazy with the lack of movement on my sitch and what that means for me (do I commit to those last 10 years or don't I).