Devastated Husband; Need Advice...Part 2

[TLEE86]

T2, thanks for your post. Really needed it today. I agree, I have to take breaks from this forum sometimes- just took a 2 week hiatus from it because of work but still needed.

How do you deal with that? I set up 3 month check-ins with myself...that no matter what, I was standing until day 91, then I would re-assess the sitch, myself. What do you think would work for you?

This isn't a surgical strike, it's a dig-in campaign.

You wrote this to me last time and I did set up a 3month check in. April, my birthday to be exact. I said I would keep going and would re-evaluate in April. I actually just wrote a re-assessment of my sitch a couple days ago. Reading over what I wrote, it sounded positive, even to me!

I re-read some of your posts to me a couple weeks back. I need to just do what I said. I told myself I would stick with this strategy (be there for her, listen to her, validate her, do the little things I stopped doing) for 3 more months until April and then re-assess from there.

Guess the reason I struggle is because I've been doing this strategy for 2.5 months, and Ive gotten my W nice to me, finding excuses to call/text me (no kids), but wonder how this is really helping bring her into the M. But...I'll put my head down, or keep it up in this case, and drive on until April. 2 more months and see where I'm at. I know that we won't be D or talking about D with the way things are going so right now this strategy is "safe." But you don't really get to where you want without taking risks do you?

What do you think? Am I being too chummy to my W?

As far as what I am doing today/tomorrow? Today is my off-day from working out, so getting some chores done and then watching the Superbowl (GO PATS!) Tomorrow, not sure yet besides work out and take the dogs to the park.