I'm just utterly gutted right now :(

[Frank75]

Hi Frank,

Glad to hear you are feeling better, yet still keeping yourself grounded!

I think the hardest part is keeping hope alive while equally steeling yourself for the semi constant lies and deception. Currently I keep realising lies I've been told and believed unquestionably at the time were so obvious! But now it's hard to trust anything positive that's said.

I hope that this is a breakthrough as it gives me hope for my own sitch, and even if not your strength is a great inspiration of where I need to get to!

I know what you mean. I'm seriously hoping she was being honest with me yesterday about calling this a separation. I keep going back and forth in my head about whether she's being honest or just using it as a way to calm me down and get me out. Could go either way but i'm trying to be more optimistic these days so we'll see what happens. Worst case scenario, it eased me into single life without being so mentally and emotionally torturous.

She has promised to help me move, drive me to the airport, hang out after i move, IM/EMail etc. She sounded genuine yesterday. I'm not sure what prompted this aside from realizing filing for divorce without talking to me again was just a shi@@y thing to do. Also these meds are making me able to focus on just talking to her and not going off the deep end each time we interact.