Seperated and she is with someone - I'm desperate

[edz]

Hi Vdubber, you're welcome.

(Now normally I abbreviate peoples names on here....may be best not to for you )

Seriously, I know. I met w at 28 a month before my birthday we were engaged 3 months later. Together 15 years (I'm your age) she was my ~third serious relationship nothing previously lasted longer than 6 months so I understand.

I was exceedingly co-dependent, it wasn't good and when issues started I couldn't properly deal with them and internalised.

This

I've never been me as we've always been us

Is something I could (and possibly did - it's been a lot of posts since then!) have said. I didnt think of "me" just our M partnership and her going left me floundering.

I haven't caught up yet as I finished work, ooo, 3 minutes ago (WFH) but have you seen any kind of counsellor? If not, and you can, then do it. It's one of the reasons I have my sanity and helped me work through a huge number of problems that had come up both before and since w left.

Still building this new me, about my third major revision in my life, but starting to think about my needs, wants and plans. Whether w joins me in them is something I have to accept is outside of my control (that's a story for my thread though)

Remember you can do nothing unless you take care of yourself, ensure you rest, sleep well and eat properly. Look into GAL, have you got the books yet? Read them they will help. Post here and post often if you have something driving at you get a journal write in that, yell at furniture and make sure you go out of the house and dont isolate yourself (my favourite trick).

Take care matey.