Toots is moving forwards..

[Sotto]

Thanks Jim. I have rung the solicitor and I'm waiting for a call back. I'll try and get an appt next week. I feel happy within myself about not filing for D and taking steps to restore financial stability. But I worry that - when we bring H into the mix - these two principles won't be compatible.

Ideally I would like confirmation that the £175k I bought into the R is a non-marital asset and for that to be released to me for my use ahead of any future settlement. I would also like some kind of limit to be imposed on his moving funds around on the basis that I may have an interest in these. These aims might be wildly optimistic - IDK.

I can't see any benefits to him of resolving our finances right now, or releasing some funds to me in a partial settlement. I would be better off and he worse off than now. Why would he do this without the lever of D? Unless he wants to be helpful - which is pretty unlikely, if we think about the mindset of WAS's in general - although my H is generally a decent person.

I know that he believes half the marital home will be the sum of my settlement, so he'll get a shock if I seek that as a starting point. I know he's also worried about job security and the downturn in his industry. So, he's probably pretty sensitive about money. I know he also thinks I should just go out, get a 'proper' job and support myself independently of him now - so I doubt he's going to be amenable, and I could just end up investing in legal fees without any success.

But, I think for me the financial side is now quite pressing. When I was up at the house last week, there were a couple of bits of post lying around to do with the dissolution of a couple of his companies. So, I'm conscious that he is probably doing things with funds that I have no idea about - and that these funds could be classed as marital assets - IDK.

Still, not much I can do for now ahead of hearing from the L. At least I now have my principles as a starting point and we'll take it from there...