Life 2.0 Pt 4

[NH115]

Good Sandi advice and Starsky-endorsed. Can't get much better than that.

We had a rough night, but she called me this morning apologizing for the harsh things she said to me. She's trying to pay more attention to the positives in our life. During the conversation, she said an interesting thing. She's trying not to focus so much on falling back in love with me per se (she's frustrated because it's not happening like she wants it to), but rather focus on the positive aspects of our life that tend to bond us. This is what the therapist has been trying to lead us towards for the last couple of sessions, though we couldn't stop arguing long enough to get there. The romantic connection can't get reestablished until the emotional connection does. We're going to go to dinner tonight (didn't happen last night due to scheduling problems) and really talk about what we both want out of life and see what kind of common ground we have.

She's still having a hard time processing OM, but that's not surprising. I can't help but notice that she seemed to feel better about OM until he came into town last week, and then she crashed after he left. She didn't really do anything wrong, seeing him at her workplace was unavoidable, and they didn't talk all that much. Interestingly enough, she used the word "withdrawal" today when talking about OM.

Sandi, your remark about laughter was prescient. She said the same thing to me today! I recall something that happened a couple of weeks ago. We watched a really stupid-funny sci fi movie. We laughed together and had a great time. Later that week we watched an action flick. Good movie, but obviously not much laughter. Later on she made a remark about how close to me she felt during the funny movie; during the other movie, not so much. I didn't connect the dots until just now. Several days passed between the two and her mood was probably different, but it still seems to me that when we laugh together, we're closer. Interesting. We're out of town for a swim meet this weekend, but I'm going to figure out something to do very soon.