Strong EA after 2yrs M - trying to detach. #3

[Complex]

I got another question that is bugging me that I disnt talk to my DB coach about:

(When) Is it actually ok to let the spouse know that you actually know way more than they think you do? In my case that means she only knows that I read her and OM text casual flirting. But she doesn't know that I know her whole exit strategy ultimately is to be together with him.

DB coach advice: what's the benefit? What does this do?
I'm actually not sure how to answer this.