Gogofo - LRT letter - planning a new beginning

[gogofo]

Here is my rough draft for my LRT letter. I welcome any and all critiques.

W

I know that you are done with our relationship and will be moving on. I would like to share with you some thought and feelings I have regarding things I did that were hurtful to you in our relationship.

I was stubborn and opinionated; you always had to make a big presentation and never got your way. I never said “okay, if that is what you want.” I never compromised on anything. I treated you like a commodity, you felt like the only way I would do something was if I would get something in return. I was selfish and never considered your wants or needs, it was me first.
I kept you tied down and controlled you schedule; you were not free to do as you wanted or desired because you were constantly waiting for me to do something or make up my mind. The socializing stopped and freedom was lost to see friends and family. The fun times stopped or were ruined by me and my selfish, controlling attitude. I was controlling, you never got anything your way because “I” new better. You were not respected and shown respect. I would start projects and never finish anything creating pandemonium and unneeded stress in the house and the relationship by having our lives in a state of limbo. I controlled the money and made you feel like you were not an equal in the relationship. I kept taking more and more from the relationship and stopped giving. I did not value your opinion, ideas, or influence, anything you liked was dumb or stupid or not good enough for me. My ideas and opinions were superior to yours. I took you for granted and never returned the love and respect and care you selflessly gave to me over the years. You gave me everything and I never gave anything back. I stopped having my own life and instead adopted yours which made you have no space or freedom or privacy or time alone. I did not communicate with you, you never had any idea what I was thinking or doing, you had to pry everything out of me, you felt alone in the relationship. I did not listen to you, when you told me what you want it did not matter because it was not what I wanted to do, provide, think, etc.
I killed all dreams with negativity and left no hope for future but work and no fun. I had actions towards you that made you feel worthless and unlovable and caused tremendous emotional pain and scaring. I did not continue with dating you and the romance was gone in our relationship. I never made the time or effort for you and us that I would have for work or any other obligation.

For all of the above, and more, I ask for your forgiveness. If you think that this is manipulation on my part, it is not. It is simply to let you know that I get it.

Despite how unhappy you have been in our relationship, your 10 year commitment to us has been remarkable. Although I don’t think that divorce is the solution to our problems, I love you and respect you enough to let you go if that is what you choose.

As painful and difficult as this situation has been, the blessing in disguise is that it has been a wakeup call and is leading me to the person I want to be, either alone or in a future relationship.

Please do not respond to this letter.

After writing all of this it helps me with seeing her perspective a little easier.