If you're SURE of this, then there's no hurry. Just wait for the next time she lies to your face about the OM and the affair. However, if a cheating spouse -- particularly a wife -- knows that her husband knows, and he doesn't be unequivocal in his boundary, I personally believe that deep damage is done.
Women tie their feelings of love for a man very closely to their feelings of RESPECT, and if he loses that, she will quickly lose attraction and love for him.
