Stay strong. You are doing better than most out there given your situation.
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We have agreed on shared 50-50 custody and a financial arrangement that is satisfactory to me and I stay in the house. I count my blessings there as I know that many have not fared as well as I seem to be.
Excellent! This is great. Make sure you show this to a lawyer and that when you sign papers, it's rock-solid.
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I already have implemented your advice on the activities. I Lift daily, box 3x a week, have been climbing at a local gym and will be joining a Divorcecare help group two days after she leaves.
Again. Great work! This is good stuff.
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I do not know on how much to concentrate on techniques to get her back. I float back and forth from accepting and sadness but bargaining and denial are rarely present anymore. So as far as the LRT ALRT and Ultimatum…?
What you are doing now, is 90% of what you need to be doing. Staying strong, etc. You are not "trying to get her back". Walk away wives can smell that a mile away. The book the Divorce Remedy has these techniques.
It's very helpful in switching the dynamic of you trying to pull her into the marriage again and always "being there" in case she changes her mind. This kind of chasing behavior turns off a wayward/cheating spouse. The LRT messes a little with their minds, while, at the same time, gives you your dignity back.
The AFTER the last resort technique means you go very dark no contact except for stuff re: kids.
The Ultimatum: Do, X, Y and Z or I file for divorce. (This may seem a moot point since you are both filing for a separation).
