What a great post on your observations and sharing what worked for your S28. I can tell you were one of those parents I'd have loved to absorb the knowledge from... and I'm glad you finally understand the why.
I have a few friends with kids with the Aspergers part of the spectrum. Kat, that's very intuitive of you. From what you wrote, you're probably right in your armchair diagnosis. One of my friends whose D17 is an Aspergers kiddo has had a lot of luck by getting her into a group of supportive peers. BTW, her mom is the first one who came to me to ask if I could help her get a divorce like mine... she's in your shoes. Her D17 graduates in May and I need to hook up with her to get the skinny. What I do know is that she advocated for her D17 when it came down to interviewing schools.
My chiropractor also has a D20 with Aspergers. She's got some mental health issues on top of them, which make her path even more difficult. BUT, she's at CU at the moment, and they have a wonderful mentoring program to help these kids focus and stay on track. Heck, she even has a peer call her an hour before class and walk to class with her.
Ellie, I totally love that martial arts suggestion. I've heard so many good things about it from lots of folks - it instills focus and discipline and the rewards are observable and achievable.
And another someone I know has an adult son who sounds a lot like Ellie's S28. This kiddo went to technical school and is now an appliance repairman. He has enough social skills to talk to homeowners with respect, courtesy and friendliness, but his job success is not hinged on those characteristics (like teaching or sales). His job is to repair their malfunctioning appliances. Apparently, he's really good at that job. And he also is congratulated for having the most organized van in their fleet.
Someone else has a daughter who is a vet tech. Animals respond well to those kiddos, and the vet is the one who is doing the heavy social interaction. Her job is very specific and rewarding. I think there is a lot you can do to find jobs and/or vocational training that include socialization, but the bulk of the job is performing specific tasks that are measurable and are the focus of the job itself.
My special needs kiddo is going to have to have the opposite: a job that is heavily social and not reliant on specific skills. Once we get through this transition to 18, I think we'll go through the volunteer training at the Dumb Friends League. She did really well at the humane society, but that's kind of far. She needs to be around people, but the animals are what she needs to feel happy and fulfilled. I'm starting to realize that I'm working myself up to a completely different life as well. Only this time around, I really like the thought of being the push behind her success.
Anyhoo, hope you can get some specific areas to work on. Ellie's list is pretty thorough...
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
