Does your daughter have a counselor? If she does, I would maybe see if you can meet with the counselor and bring this up. If she doesn't, then you should get her one.
If your wife is not there as much as you say she is, then you need to try and find a way to document this. I am not sure how, but if you can you will be able to maybe use it in court to get custodial care of your daughter.
If you can't document it you may have to consider getting your state department of children and families involved. I know this sounds drastic, but from my experience it was not as bad as people think. They would do an investigation. They would interview your daughter, her mother, you, maybe a counselor if given permission. If they find the situation is bad, they would probably first recommend that you take the daughter for most of the time. If your wife does not agree, they could even go to court and force it for your daughters welfare. They won't disclose who reported the issue.
Twisting on Life's Rope Me53 W53 M20 D21 D19 D16 BD 2-2013 D final 1-2015 _________________________ "Dream about tomorrow, Live for today, Learn from yesterday"