Hi Mozza, I'll chime in here and echo what everyone else has said. I think you shouldn't file for D unless you are truly, truly done. I have an image in my mind here of Starsky moving his lawn, tears streaming down his face knowing that he was truly done. That may not be the best example, as I know Starsky had filed earlier, and then he and the fetching Mrs S reconciled. But it has stayed in my mind of what feeling 'truly done' feels like. I'm a ways from being there yet, and from your posts, it doesn't sound as though you are there either.
I would go for the 'this isn't what I want, but if it is what you want I respect your wishes and won't stand in your way' stance. Then don't enable a D at all, work with the longest timescales you can, without obstructing and see how things unfold.
Toots x
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
