The Hen House

[Vanilla]

I dis read the man cave thread and was both saddened and enlightened. Saddened because the reason we DB is to obtain a good mix of opinions on our sitch and the posts felt very unbalanced. It would have hurt greatly if action was taken on the basis of some of the opinions given. Enlightened because some posts shone brightly about connection and the need for connection.

Does biology influence thought and behaviour. In repeatable experimentation it has been shown it does, but the situation is complex and testing not empirical. The basic premise of Venus and Mars is a pop psychology stance.

Does male biology equal Mars and similarly female biology equal Venus. In most cases there is a correlation between the two but not causative. It is a false conclusion to deduce that structure equals sexuality and sexuality is behaviour.
Generalisation won't help us.

As males and females we are on a continuum of behaviour sets. To set precedents over behaviour based on gender perimeters is unscientific. I doubt if this can be repeated.

For example measuring the size, function, electrical conductivity and blood flow has demonstrated little in the discussions of form over function. male and female brains and bodies have more in similarity than difference. We are unique as individuals a combination of our genetics, health and experience. In our ability to feel emotion then we are generic, we love, hurt cry and pray in the same way.

Our bodies are the suit that we wear on a day to day basis, but our higher power is universal. The essentials within our souls are equal and we are connected with humanity by spirit and love. Is there a masculine spirit or a feminine spirit, are these distinguishable in love?

If men feel emasculated or women feel they emasculate then I believe it is because the fear of being less than who we should be. We are diminished in our own eyes and that is our fear. If are with love and respect then we can not diminish and if we have strong boundaries we will not fear being reduced.
Strong men and strong women define themselves by their own definition and not by roles set by an uncertain society. Men and women are leaders in their own life and as a model for others because of their capability. This is not defined by earning power or the capability of nurture but is of how we love and live.

We come to the end of our lives and when faced with our mortality the answer to our being is how we lived and loved, not how male or female we are. In pain and death men and women are equal. Our spirits rise with the beauty of nature and our harmony within it.

I want us to honor our similarities and notice our differences, to treat each other with respect and love, whether we are in same sex R or traditional relationships. For as we are made by nature and spirit then we are flesh and blood and the same under the skin. If we do nothing then we label the destruction of our R with suggestions that it is our sexual differences that contribute when surely it our behaviour that is the cause.

We have one book DR and DB principles that apply to both sexes in whatever R, we have Sandi guidance which is for both. We do not modify this because of our sex, age, nationality, race or religious belief. We accept individuality and our body suit is one of our individual attributes contributing to personality.

I for one am very glad it is this way.

Vanilla