Originally Posted By: Complex
Since I told my boss/friend, and some of my friends and also parents I get bombarded with different opinions.
I stayed firm on the DB techniques (I didn't specify) and told them I want to do it the "right" way. Because I married my wife for a reason and I will take this opportunity to become a better person, with or without her. I'm moving forward but I'm not "giving up" so at the end of my life I can say to myself I did everything I can, no regrets.

But there are wide opinions of course, from "she's crazy, it's terribly wrong how what she is doing", to "ask her to do counseling", "you guys have to TALK". I agree on everything everyone is saying (only my mentor and parents know all details) but regardless I am defending her and my marriage. It feels like the right thing to do.
One advice I'll probably take and see a lawyer just to get informed about my legal situation.

I think I am completely on the right track with my heart.
The only thing I am definitely struggling with is boundaries, and that I sometimes feel like a door mat....and the never ending pain. Especially knowing that my wife is still doing things terribly wrong, and I know she's better than this. I KNOW that when she realizes that I'm not so bad after all and a great person that is moving into the right direction with big steps, she will open up to me again.
If it's going to save our marriage??? ....that I don't know.
Unless she is understanding many of the things that I've recently learned and opening her heart I could not go back into a R with her. And like I said..I'm moving to a pessimistic point of view on how everything will play out. It's such a sad thing frown Marriage means nothing anymore in this world frown

How do you deal with friend and family "advice"?
And in general...how did/do you keep yourself ALIVE?^^


Btw, yesterday when my wife was lying on the couch sleeping, I looked at her and she looked kinda cute, but she also looked like a very weak & confused person.

Do WAWs actually ever reach a breaking point where they think they are completely nuts and they get depressed and question everything they are doing?


I would stick to DB coaches and people who know these situations. Don't try to validate with the world, they don't usually understand properly. Your going to be fine with or without the wife. I hope you can accept that.