Sorry you had to go through that. I to have just confirmed my wife's affair. It's a mess and the pain almost unbearable. You will survive though.
The positive you can take is that it makes detachment easier. I thought I was detached. Have only worked out now that I wasn't. Now I truly am. We have a long road ahead but we will heal with or without them


Me:40 W:35
D:8
T:13 M:10
WAW: 7/14
PA Discovered: 1/15 at least 6 months
Moved out and moved on