Requesting support and direction

[Andy125]

Ok so today I’m having a little bit of a dilemma, maybe one of you can offer some insight. Obviously over the last few days you have read about how I’m learning to, and practically GAL. I have really enjoyed it and it has felt really good simply to take back some aspects of my life again. I’m enjoying how things are steadily improving for me; I’m enjoying the feeling of happiness that is creeping in. But at the same time, it’s becoming very apparent that when I’m home and having to deal with my W’s little bits of BS I don’t want her there anymore. Her level of self-absorbedness is becoming glaringly apparent, and honestly I’m tired of supporting it. Yesterday or the day before she started to address me by my first name (something that isn’t normally done) at first it bothered me a little bit, but then I just shrugged it off. It didn’t however go over both my D’s head. They made a point of saying something about it. Later at dinner we were all sitting down eating and Bing went her phone (historically this has been the OM). She then must have put the phone on vibrate because it didn’t Bing but would buzz and she would answer. Just as soon as my D’s were done with dinner I got up cleaned up their plates and began cleaning up dinner dishes (I also hummed to myself while I did the dishes, just a happy little tune to keep me focused). Later that night my W decided to go to the gym, so I was left to put D5 to bed… not a problem we have a great time at bedtime. When I went to put D8 to bed she made no effort to go say good night to her Mom, and honestly I didn’t push her to like I have in the past. At random later that evening my W sent me a Pinterest message with an wood working project… it was just odd time for it to come… and as I sit here typing this I realize that those have come in the past, after I have overheard some session with the OM.

Anyways this morning I really just felt that I simply don’t care anymore. That her moving out is going to be a good thing. That I’m tired and done…. And don’t want to keep on living this negative life. It was also coupled with a great feeling of joy as I thought about the next step in this adventure. Monday I start school, today I was able to elicit the help of some female friends to advise me on style and fashion. Like I told them I want to be the good looking single Dad not the down and frumpy looking one. I guess my question is, is this line of thinking ok? Can it exist and I can still take the DB approach? Does this come as you detach more? If you were to ask me if I still want my marriage to work out? If I still love my wife and don’t believe that divorce is the answer to our problems, my response would be yes. I just feel that right now her moving out is probably a really good thing… Maybe it’s that I need my own space right now, free of the constant barrage of BS that is her S@#t storm. My kids I think need it too. I don’t know…. thoughts? Good? Bad? Normal?