Singing in the Lifeboat

[daring]

Ha thanks Cali- I had yet another opportunity to STFU tonight.

I was mad as hell at H before I even got home.
I knew he got paid on the 15th from his new job and he had said he would make sure he gets me his portion of the monthly expenses for kids. Normally I would be more flexible but I had an unexpected big quarterly tax payment for our nanny, plus the cost of his work travel recently that conveniently came out of his PayPal account that he is having difficulty unlinking from my account, and I'm about to make our first exorbitant IRS payment on Wed.
Oh and my bonus will be late b/c the calculations for the end of year were messed up and they had to go back and redo it.

So I notice it's getting lean until I get paid on Friday and I call H on my way home to see if he can put the money in for the month. No answer. So I get to my house and he's there dropping off kids. So I pull him aside as he's leaving and ask if he has his portion yet? He sits down and calculates it all and whaddya know- he does- and transfers it over ( we have kept one joint account to transfer in money for kids expenses). So I think I might have shot daggers out my eyeballs but I kept my words appropriate.
Then he says " S17 tells me something about using your moms car?" ( since my mom had the stroke I thought about it and S17 wants to but H thinks it's unsafe). I reminded him I put a lot of money into it for her to be sure it was ok when she was picking up S8 from school.
So he says " my suggestion is sell your moms car and the minivan you don't use much and buy him something else".
So I said " thank you for your suggestion, it's been noted".
Well..... Then the angry he can't be in control H says with voice terse " I'm not comfortable with him driving that car". I said " I understand that, however, I'm not able to buy him one right now ( thinking but not saying- because you mother f-er left me with this IRS bill) are you going to? I'm doing what I can and he may have to start with that car". He says " I'm not ok with it". I said " I see that- and you are telling me in a very aggressive manner". He takes a deep breath, calms his voice, and restates his position in a much nicer tone. I say we will see.
Then he says " do you need anything else?" I said no- thank you. Then I remembered he hadn't told me if he fixed our toll tags that are running up money b/c the cc he has them linked to has expired. I asked if he'd done it and he said no. I got frustrated and told him we were running up payments we don't need to. ( they charge you double or triple if it's not coming out automatically). He gets a little pi$$y again and says I know but I have to work too. I said yes and if I ( who works way more hours than you) could go fix it I would but the accounts are all under you. After blah blahing some more he left.

I am just so annoyed- I don't like having to babysit all this!!
Maybe I should apologize for being so angry??? I have so much on my plate I can't be my usual nice and patient about this BS!