The line between being a caring, compassionate person and a doormat is very thin and razor sharp, and sometimes you're going to step on the wrong side of that line.
It is normal, completely normal, to have feelings of being used... I did, most people did/do I bet. Thing is, you are standing, and here, by your own choice. She isn't holding a gun to your head, ya know? You are choosing this path.
I re-framed that messiness into "I am a compassionate person providing a safe, sane place for someone who is hurting and trying to fix herself, as if she was a sister who had a drug problem or something, I accept I may never be re-paid, and I'll not EXPECT that, but choose this because of who I am."
Can you find a way to re-frame it that works for you?
Many times I was in "one day at a time" mode... "one day may be the day I quit, but today is not that day".
The DB coaches are very good and can see things in sitches that aren't obvious, it cant hurt to try their suggestions for a while and see where they go.
Another thing I did was set myself up with 90 day "self-checkins". I would choose to continue another 90 days, no matter what, so I did not have to ask myself if I wanted to continue standing daily/weekly...I already made the contract with myself, so that head space consumption was minimized.
I agree with MCS that this internship will be a dose of reality for her.
How about this.... follow the DB coaches suggestions for the next 3 months, during her internship, and see what changes? And GAL as much as possible during that time..Then check in with yourself then, and leaving the "should I stay or go" question off the stove for 90 days?
What think you?
On another note, a fun one... want to be be a bada$$ boss in the kitchen...on the cheap and in your own time? Go buy "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" by Julia Child and go through the whole book, beginning to end, making every recipe... you will know more about cooking and the why's and how's than most people... and be a sexy bada$$ in the kitchen.
Hang in there!!
Last edited by TSquared2; 01/19/1502:00 AM.
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
