yes, still a work in a progress, still laying foundation! As far as OW I'm not sure what the status of that is now. When he was home in Feb I had my suspicions, keeping his phone with him, caught him texting at 230am and when I dropped him at the airport he went somewhere but did not fly out of country until 2 days later based on his airline skymile account. His story didn't add up.
When we were on vacay in July I did some snooping and did find several texts, emails and pictures going back as far as March with one woman from the UK. He happened to spend 3 days in the UK prior to coming back to the states, I found that by snooping as well. He denied anything physical which I don't believe.
I have no idea what the current status is, lots of possibilities. At this point I'm sure there is nothing physical going on since he is home most days and all nights. But I know he's not interested in me sexually and he has always been very sexual which has been a huge issue in our M because I wasn't.
Honestly, I'm torn on what I should be doing. I'm trying to connect positively with him and I guess I'm trying to believe that is possible without pursuing. Maybe I need to rethink that?? But we are connecting, yesterday I was in the garage with him "working" on the jeep and asking questions and getting along well. Later in the kitchen re:D13 being a hypochondriac we were joking and laughing. Then he goes in "his" room and goes to bed and leaves me longing for a physical connection. Sigh.
This jeep project really has made me realize that we both have been just existing for a long time. He is really excited about this jeep, I haven't seen him this excited about something in a long time, if ever. I'm trying to let go of past regrets and resentments, not easy to do. I see so much potential for us and I'm just not sure he wants to see it. But, this is what I was talking about yesterday and stop asking why. I'm too hung up on the why he's doing (or not doing) what he's doing. I'm trying not to be too hard on myself, but I am coming up on the one year mark and although I've made lots of progress I think I should be further along.
Me-44 (45) H- 50 (51) M-'96
S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)
BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas) home Oct(sep rooms) (EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed) insists wants D through July 2015 no more talk of D since
