Because here's the thing -- and I'm not trying to be a dick, I'm really not. But (and this is where I start to sound like a dick), I get the impression from what you've posted, that you were looking for a "wife" and not a life partner. You liked showing off your wife to your buddies. You've mentioned that you missed having the fact that there was dinner on the table when you got home and the dogs were taken care of. You pride yourself (and I don't think there's anything wrong with that) on being able to provide a lifestyle where your W didn't have to work. But at the same time, you got angry about she didn't understand how hard you were working. You got entitled about YOUR money, YOUR career. You've been critical about how W is handling school, the separation etc.
I can't help but wonder what it is that you want in a partner? Because I'm getting mixed signals. It sounds like you want someone who embodies the "traditional" roles in a marriage. But on the other hand, it sounds like you want someone you respect, and I don't get the impression from your posts that you respect your wife and her choices, because they aren't what you would've done/how you would handle things. I think you want someone who will say "look at this wonderful life you've given me TEE, I'm so grateful for your hard work!" yet, I think you want someone who pulls their own weight.
Sometimes, I wonder if you've thought that you were better than your W because of your accomplishments. And sometimes I wonder if your W can live up to the expectations you have (whatever they may be).
I wonder if you truly get why your W is on the path she's on? We can say we understand, but do you truly, truly understand?
These are some very good questions to be explored, regardless of answer.
What kind of man do you want to be?
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
