I feel your pain Dawgy. I just don't see how they can look at themselves in the mirror and sleep at night.
I filed for legal separation which is a not quite divorce. The process is the same, you divide up assets and debts but it's not a divorce. It gives you time to think. If you still want to divorce, it's a small step. It also gives you time to talk things through more calmly.
I am in the same boat. My wife wants us to be friends. Dont see that happening. I wish her the worst for blowing up our family. Sorry but that is how I feel today.