Responding Vs Reacting

[Faith2b]

Wow just met with exh at the house. He called me to come and I thought help with something. Actually I thought he had the girls and they would be coming over to see their new bed. Well he asked me to the house so I went. He wanted me to sit with him the old me would have said no way come on lets get to business. I thought he had moved all remaining furniture but he did not.

He again was trying to kiss hug and whoopi. I had to tell him no again. I reiterated the point that I was uncomfortable. He stopped he said what do you want. I said to better communicate about the kids only. That we should focus on them.

I asked him if he needed my help with moving he said no I said ok he said "You trust me right? To get all this out by tonight?" I said yes I do. The old me would have been very upset and worried about him doing all this work alone and under time restraints. But I just said I trusted him. He seemed to have needed me to confirm things in him.

he then said this is your last opportunity to say what I need to say I said ok like what. He said anything. I said ok but its only about he kids. He insisted that I tell him what I really needed to say. I broke and said. I only bitched complained and spoke my mind about things but ultimately its your decision. Your the man and I no matter what trust your decision. What ever makes you happy I support because we have kids and I want you to be the best for them. I also told him that I apologize for my anger. I told him I completely understand why he filed the RO and that I had been very angry towards him and I take full responsibility. I said I hope that he can forgive me. I said I am moving forward and I want him to as well.

I told him that I have said time and time what I want and its in his court now.

I also mention that I read the RO and I agreed to all of it.

I also mentioned my career because this was a point he always stressed. He did not want me to find a new job. I told him that I was only trying to find something better for our family and it was not to have some career. I told him at his point after all that has happened Im just going to stay where I am its not worth what it has caused to try and change.

Overall I may have said to much but I feel like hey. I put the ball in his court successfully. Im pretty upset and really have to pray because once again your with ow and your trying to make me the person you cheat with?!?!?! I really feel kinda insulted by this. But overall it helps me to get more closure. I wanna detach for sure.

How dare he make me anything other than #1


well more detaching for me I really wanna find me. I wana be in a place were I have a deserving partner. Someone who wants total commitment with me only. I hope its him....although this statement is pretty much speaking out of love. NO feelings because Im pretty much not so into him.

Ugh I know he sounds like scum but he is a great guy. Im so disappointed in him. Well he seemed very distraught after the convo. Ugh ok well please leave observations and comments.