OK - I'm all caught up now. I really struggle(d) with these 2 options as well, particularly around the 3 month separation mark. In the end I have settled on LRT (not initiating contact) mostly because that seems to be the advice given around here. Do I have doubts? Sure! Do I wonder if my H and R are different and warrant a different approach? You bet!
In the end though I suspect this comes back to me and my personality. Like you I feel a need to control and influence so I am learning to just sit back and watch. What I am seeing is that H is far from moved on. Where that will go I don't know, but in contrast to the early days I do feel pretty confident that he will initiate contact at some point. I'm contemplating saying to H next time - hey, there's lots of fun stuff going on at the moment. What do you think about the idea of me contacting you once in a while to see if you want to go? Just so I can get an update on where he's at with his requirement for space.
So back to you. Since it's only 2 weeks I say let things be. Let your F drive the bus as he wants to. Trust that he will initiate contact if he wants to.
Emotional distancer - I have my own ideas about that term. What do you mean by it?
H 37 Me 36 Together 15 years Married 5 years No kids BD Apr 2014 H moved out 2 Jun 2014
