Strong EA after 2 years of marriage. Need advice.

[Complex]

Just to summarize the situation to make it clear and also state why my hopes are so slim:

- Wife completely convinced we shouldn't have gotten married. We had a purely romantic love, no foundation and lacking connection.
- OM at work (successful doctor) - they see each other every week.
- She told me she loves him - he is clearly playing along and they even claimed to have an 'unfulfilled complicated relationship' (saw texts)
- W knows OM for 6 years, they have been friends and she always had feelings for him (except of the time when I came into her life, for 1-2 years)
- W does not want to work on M at all, it's over for her (she was at a point 5 months ago where she tried, but by herself, no outside help, no team work - while I was just very challenged and not clear minded - then she let herself go with the emotions to OM)