Well if I insist on my boundaries I jeopardize my green-card, and the D will take place much faster than anticipated. But I cannot accept what is going on. It's him or me. But maybe that's too much of black and white thinking!?
Well, one's basic, two or three or four CORE BOUNDARIES OF PERSONAL INTEGRITY *should* be black and white. That's pretty much the definition of core boundaries.
Still, you cannot control the other person -- only how YOU will react to them, and what you will accept (and not accept). That's the difference between BOUNDARIES and ULTIMATUMS.
