Married fast? Too late? Completely stuck :/

[Complex]

OK..
I sneaked through my wives phone, after I've seen her on Whatsapp multiple times, then I saw the last conversation there was with me..weeks ago. So she must've deleted messages.
When I came home she was in the bathroom and I looked at whatsapp again. There was an empty message of some guy in there.

I casually asked her if she's using whatsapp at all since there is iMessage now. She tells me only for me and her cousin. I tried to not upset her but was like I see you on whatsapp all the time and she gets nervous but tells me there's nothing. And I'm like so why do I see you there...'why don't yoh show me, sorry if I mistrust you' she gets her phone and on the way deleted the empty message.
I look at it and tell her 'ok now I know you're lying'. Blown!

THEN: Long discussion, it's only an EM. I believe her but I'm prepared for more. I can tell she pretty much only told me what's necessary. They only talk as friends but I'm sure some of you guys have heard that before.
Her schedule etc doesn't really allow an affair, there's no sign that there could be sth, but I'll keep track of the mileage of her car or so to double check.
Everyone was right. Details leak slowly.

Bottom line EA confirmed. She still is convinced we are not meant to be and it was a terrible mistake of hers getting married and she's painfully suffering that she is doing this to me.

Bad day very bad...going to lock myself in and cry for a bit now