I've shifted my perspective a bit. I'm continuing to offer words and deeds of support and not having any expectation or resentment about it. H is hurting a lot and very stressed about this. I will help in the only way I am really able--by taking childcare duties off his plate as much as possible and not making him feel bad about that.
That is what I do (I would think) if we were together.
This is not about me right now. And if I feel like I need a break, I can call on someone else to help.
Labug. .. yes, sometimes I act so entitled. Can you say more? I'm not sure what you mean about finding out where it comes from.
-- I'm angry that my H was not as strong and willing to work on the R as I thought he would be.
--I'm angry that I wasn't stronger and healthier until now.
--I'm angry that I never had a good role model of a good marriage.
-- I'm angry that my D will grow up in a split home
--I'm angry that I have to change my lifestyle and not have someone to share the good and tough parenting moments with.
-- I'm angry that I didn't find DB sooner.
--I'm angry that my H didn't know how to help me.. no one really did.
--I'm angry that I have to lose time with my daughter. As a working mom I don't have that much time with her to begin with-- and no one to share the daily house hold duties with.
Gee, I guess I have a lot of anger.
I've come a long long way, but it is not a linear process. Onwards we go. thanks.
OK, Claire, you've been chawing on this anger for a couple of weeks now. Time to move on? (I swear it gets easier once you do.)
There are two statements up there that start with "I'm angry that my H..." There is nothing you can do about those but forgive his incapacity. (Your mom agrees with me, you told me so.)
For the rest though, you can plan and then execute your mitigation strategy, starting RIGHT NOW. For each of those, drop the anger immediately and turn it into positive action.
