At the end I was the screaming bansheeee, but h had been hammering me for well over 12 months, it exploded out of me. Every fight every drama.
It's funny tho about h story was exactly the same for both of us. I only knew xw after the r had hit the floor, but that was h story. Did I think at the time h disappeared the item, nope. But now I feel unsure. Given how his story about us both us very much the same I do wonder.
There have been hints about h having affairs while with xw.
Lambies good but legs decidely crooked. it's should only get stronger. Being butted in the knee cap by a wet wooley is far from Exciting, funny yes. They do tend to get water logged in extended wet periods. Lambies getting quite big compared to when we got him.
As to ow, I'm thinking she's got no clue what's really going on or gone on. In way my guess on her is innocent victim. She Does however own the rough end of that damn pineapple and soon there isn't going to be a smoother end. She just doesn't know it yet. Evidence shows she is trying to appear to be me! Foolish woman.
Me I had a kind of idea, but still the reality was 3 steps removed.
S17 will work it out, he's smarter than he wants to show. He likes the dumb role, means the bar isn't set so high. He's old enough that I can't force him to do anything nor do I want to. Something h never understood. He is tho coming out if the wood work 2 phone calls in 2 days, a world record breaking attempt.
I think he expects and is trying to make me spew at him like h, but even angry these days I don't yell or scream. Hence his upping the threats, to try and force me to change back my methods of dealing with him.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
I think your right that S17 will work it out but he will test as much as he can. I got away in my teenage years by setting my bar pretty low (if i put no effort in i had an excuse for failing) so that may be what S17 is doing. S17 is fortunate enough that he has a mum who is actually interested in his wellbeing.
As for H, it does sound like working through your lawyer is going to be a sensible plan if only for the stability that will provide. difficult to spew through a through a third party that is paid to protect your interests.
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
Hope you're ok this evening (morning? Roundyworldyconfusion!!)
Having had some issues as a teen with my dad I can say sometimes teens, well boys (was never a girl - not even at weekends - so can't comment!) Push to get a response as it creates a known state a comfort zone even if its a state of being shouted at as I got to sometimes. Given what you've said about h maybe s sees you as a touch point. As you say he's 17 its an age trying to figure out what to do as an adult given h he may be trying to figure out from you some direction or stability even if he doesn't know that himself.
As Jim says he's lucky to have a mum who has his wellbeing at heart.
Again just from my experiences, my dad is a passive aggressive but nothing else, we sorted our relationship in the end but not till my mum passed and I was in my 20s.
Last edited by edz; 01/11/1509:46 PM.
M:44, W:46, S:10 M 13 years, T 15 BD:23/7/2014 W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014 My new place: 21/11/2014 W/S back to flat 22/11/2014 W coming closer, talking 4/2015 Piecing 5/2015 Moving in again 6/2015
I am glad S17 is trying to reach you. You are doing some mind reading there. S17 is in the middle of all this turmoil and he has his own turmoil to deal with.
Everything around him is upside down and he probably feel lost, that is one of the reasons for his bad behavior.
You gave him tough love. Respect or take the highway. That is hard for a 17 year old. But seems it is working on his case. You are his strong pillar and he knows it too.
Now, no one really knows what your H tells and talk to him when you are not present. It could be a big confusion in his mind. Some adults use the kids to implement their campaign against their spouses during D.
Sometimes I play cards, sometimes poker with my boys or even some internet games like "The Gene", just to have fun and straighten our bond. It works very well, my boys are not only my kids, they are also my friends.
Maybe next time he is around or visiting, you can try to get on his calm side and enjoy some time together.
Hope things with your H will get at least a little better. At least here, L are a fortune. I can not think if I need so much L time. I will bankrupted after the D.
Ahhhhh... those horrible M&Ms jumping all your way. Hope you are keeping up with your diet. I know it is very hard to keep up with diet, but they are necessary for the high heels.
I hit the gym on saturday and sunday this weekend. Hooray!
Keep the hard work GG, you will be in a better place then your abusive H. He needs a lot of work on himself.
Xh has care of s17 at the present time. Xh hated current. H.
The fact h is trying to rally xh to his cause is showing how screwed up things in h head are. S17 does not want a bar of h.
Given that h assulted him for no reason, s17 had indicate some time ago (which folks could have missed) that h used to occasionally jump out at him from behind stuff and wack him. This wasn't the first time.
H thought my s17 was liar, interfered in our r, Manipluated stole, was lazy dumb etc. he is not his father! So as far as I know he is not seeing h. Unless he has been lieing to me and his dad.
Some other news tonight, but turns out the truth does wiggle out, and what I was told tonight shows my h gaslights all women or a few selected ones he thinks he can get away with it on.
Which explains why we used to get angry female abuse on the answering machine. A lot more truths are falling out.
S17 rang me twice today, first time was to get a cat well 7 actually. Then there was an incident where the cat attacked him, and he had to go to hospital. For steri strips and anit biototics. Um no we weren't getting a cat, no not even a preggo one, I do not need another 7! No no no no double no!
Yes seems s17 and me are getting on better, which is nice. I cannot allow him to get away with threatening me and he has completely acted out on me physically .
I need to enforce the boundary.
Oh I knew today was gunna be an odd one, the big spot bit me. Let the hounds in for a bed snuggle and he got so excited fleeing himself he nipped me, I squarked and yelped. It slightly broke the skin and left quite a bruise.
He was truely upset and had that big puppy hang dog look. oh well it's only skin.
Damn bin missed the run too. I thought I had it out soon enough but alas no, lit not full so all good. Will have to make sure I get it out earlier.
Last edited by Ggrass; 01/12/1511:50 AM.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Absolutely right Gg no one - Ever - should have to tolerate any kind of threats in a r be it spouse, child, parent or relative.
Im really happy you and S17 are getting on better, as to the cats well this big one is enough, two was sometimes a handful, 7? arghhhhhhh and I dont have lambie etc to deal with!
M:44, W:46, S:10 M 13 years, T 15 BD:23/7/2014 W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014 My new place: 21/11/2014 W/S back to flat 22/11/2014 W coming closer, talking 4/2015 Piecing 5/2015 Moving in again 6/2015
Good that your R your S17 are getting better. Tough love is hard on us moms, but it is where kids learn the most. It's seems your son is a good kid, just in the middle of a turmoil he did not ask for.
We adults get angry and we vent somewhere because we can, we are adults. When it comes to small kids, everyone is worry of their well being. But the teenagers, and I love them so much, they are the ones big enough do not put a fit, and they are not old enough to take part on the decisions, and they don't know enough to understand it all of the whole adult game in life.
The poor things are dealing with ups and downs on their own, trying to figure it out what to do with their lives and then they need to do all this in the middle of a battle of the adults that should be their role models.
Ah, I love the teenagers... have some sympathy for them and I really believe that they deserve better. But I also think that tough love teach them too. They start getting the whole boundary issue (I myself struggle with the whole thing).
He knows you love him beyond limits and will always be there for him. He loves you too. This is probably the most important person for you right now.
Love the pink dress and shoes. You guess why I am "Pink". With so many guys in my house (H and 3 sons), I always make sure I am the girl. Love Pink.
I wrote a big long prophetic post, the one that was going to change the world and cure cancer, make hunger go away and stop all wars.
But the internet ate it and it is lost forever.
I love Pink too, its my favourite colour in all shades and tones.
Diet started today in real earnest again. Haven't weighed myself but last couple of weeks I have been using food as a bandage. That changes today, the next struggle with self begins.
Vanilla
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
So your posting v, can you at least remember the lottery number for Wednesdays draw, ill split it with you?
;-)
I'm sure all of you look stunning in your various pink attire, I've always been known as the man in black (or really dark blue, no not going into a Lego movie quote) mostly as its slimming and a 6'4 man in white or similar looks bl00dy enormous! That said developing a hankering for burgendy and grey in my post bd attire.
So v what's on the menu tonight then, pork with spicy rice here tonight (having to lean on the chilli and shallots harder than I though as my peppers are on the turn doh!)
Watch those heels gg, sure every man in the area will be!
M:44, W:46, S:10 M 13 years, T 15 BD:23/7/2014 W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014 My new place: 21/11/2014 W/S back to flat 22/11/2014 W coming closer, talking 4/2015 Piecing 5/2015 Moving in again 6/2015