Busting this Divorce - 90 Days NC #5

[Mozza]

Thanks for sharing the Denver thread. I just read the one above. It was inspiring, especially knowing it ends in R. One an tell through the whole argument that they both want the M. She mentions she wasn't done thinking and even hints she was leaning towards him, etc. He repeats he didn't want that but OM changed everything, etc. Sounds like his dropping of the rope made her realize what she'd be missing.

It made me reflect on my own sitch, of course. I don't feel much of this reciprocal desire to fix things if it weren't so messed up, as in Denver's. My W is more "Oh well, it didn't work out. But all is good now, let's be friends."

I'm glad you're having an attitude adjustment, for your own good. I was reflecting on your tone recently and to me it comes across as martyrdom. "I'm right, she's wrong, but I'm such a martyr for the good cause, I'll take it all. She's crazy, I'm reasonable." I think it would do you good, it would make it easier on you to see her as less crazy and you as less righteous. Personally, I reflect often on how I drove my M where it is and it makes me much more tolerant of my W's behavior. Part of it is payback after all. She suffered and now it's my turn. If I didn't give her all that suffering, maybe she wouldn't be giving it back to me.

Looking forward to how things go for you from now on. It's an interesting experiment.