Busting this Divorce - 90 Days NC #5

[edz]

Hi HP

Not sure if you've read my sitch. My r with s is one of the key reasons w quoted walking away. I've said this on several posts so guys forgive me reiterating. W and I had pursuer / pursued issues I'm or I was codependant before bd. W pushed me I withdrew into myself and redirected that frustration distancing s. And here I am.

For 4 weeks I didn't see s and losing then both nearly killed me. Now s comes and stays at least once a week. After years of working instead of attending sports events because I was working etc I finally got it. He didn't know where he stood with me if I really cared not because of what I did but because of inaction.

All these ^^^^ guys got your back on this, based on my experience with my s (our sitches are otherwise obviously different) please make time and pause the rest.

Not saying you're right or wrong just that its not always apparent to them. I've always loved my s but he was unsure, may still be somewhere in there, but I'll make sure my actions show my interest to ensure its apparent. He needed to know none of this was his fault and for me to talk and reassure him. W still doesn't really engage with me regarding r, may not do again but I won't lose s as well.

S and I have our own new traditions and were building fun things we do together but its taking time. Its all stressful and painful and yes it brings frustration. I let that frustration damage my relationship with s and I hope I'm now fixing that, if you want to chat on this just shout.