May your new year be

[Ggrass]

Yeap, guys you do get it.

It is often the way there is a smoother and fixer in all r. It was more so the fibs, which the extent of which is only really coming out. The fact h used to say he was broke, the truth was far far from that now I see.

I always felt I had to compete, that there was no first place for me. That h needed to be first in fact h actions showed this. If h wasn't first h walked off often after a rage to do exactly what h wanted. Not even a death in my family could stop him. This is something to work on, being worthy. Finding my worth.

Ic said those times showed immaurity lack of support and empathy for my feelings. At those times h words and actions matched. Other times h words were pretty much lip service words and actions did not remotely match.

Often h would be talking support but sneering at you. His words emotions and actions were out of sync, I often didn't see the emtional disconnect or the oddness of them not being matched. Not till I have been reading extensively and had server so ah ha moments.

Yes the chritsmas thing was my lack of boundaries, but I tryed to set them but h doesn't respect other people setting limits, they don't appy to him.
H after been told in words nc with my s17, then refused to acknowledge, that s17 wants nc. It was then raised in mediation to which h pretened he could read or understand the formatting of the email he did not agree nor even acknowledge.

H was then texted my personal bounderies of c if there was to be any between s17 and ss25. Even after all of that being made clear in writing h still approached xh to seek his ok for contact with s17. Which was not ok, if h takes action on this threat of contact I will take it further.

Unfortunately h sees you working with him and being conciliatory as a way to push back your boundaries, which h does seemlessly and effortlessly, before you know where you are you are doing the things you stated hurt you.

In the spirt of compromise you end up giving up ground, h gives up nothing. In fact h is more likely to turn the table and gain more than h asked for. Hence the standing up to the bloke the other day was such a victory, refusing to take on others crapola that's not my drama is something for me to work on. Not fixing the empathising and validating I've slipped on a tad which showed the other day. Although a casual aquaintence I dint really owe then that much on the validating his feelings, it's not really my issues.,