May your new year be

[Ggrass]

Jim I know that, but when I asked for what I wanted and needed (without going away specifics that will identify) I came out and said I would prefer.

H would often use other family members as out ranking me, his s, his widowed mother (mine was a widow too) his nephew.

So at Christmas there was no compromise it had to include his m, but my family was optional. My birthday 3 years running h organised dinner at his mothers house same night. I was controlling and selfish for not conceding.

H last birthday he cracked the sads because I never have him his gift till the night, even tho he chose to work. I forgot I think to SMS durring the day. H picked a fight.

Yes from my side it sounds awful, but I know I made most of concessions willingly as I thought it was for the longer term good. looking back h actions really showed he wasn't genuine, lots of r talk no action.

There were good times too. Those good times are why you stay so long, the poker machine pay off. Just enough good to keep you hooked.

I have been really looking closely at the whole thing, I never want to repeat the whole train wreck, it nearly killed me.
I want to know I want to be different I want to know how to see the signs and how to make me the important person in the r. No more waiting till I am empty.