Gogofo - no longer piecing 2nd BD - pt. 2

[gogofo]

I am going to keep on DBing. I do not want to live in a low desire R, but I do not think it will stay this way. The desire ebbs and flows along with our outside stresses.

I am going to try to keep communicating and back off on the pressure. I know I can survive this marathon and wait for things to change slowly. I am committed to reconciling this R.

I know she is more open to sex on vacation because she really wants me and comes on to me when we are on vacation.

There is not abuse in her past. If there is this is something she has never brought up before and has hid it well.

The outside pressures that have changed are only on my side, but not much. She/we still has plenty of stress. Currently here is the list of stresses we have, besides our daily jobs and our two kids:

W is getting a doctoral degree
W is applying for a new position
trying to sell house
reconciliation
company issues at my job
new puppy
W's brother has substance abuse issues affecting our nieces

So our lives are full of outside stress and commitments and for her our M is not a place of zero stress.

I have been creating a household that is as stress free as possibly. I have been taking care of the majority of the housework, laundry, dishes, etc. so she can come back from work to a place that is not in a chaotic matter. She hates disorder in our home and so do I.

It is this emotional connection and comfort to share and relax with me that is missing. She has said before that it will just take time and I am okay with that.