21 Years - Walkaway Wife - Please Help!

[staytog]

I spoke to her yesterday, I know there is underlying anger when she talks to me, we started with a good call about my daughter and what a great cook she is, when we talk about the kids the calls go GREAT! I asked her if I could talk to her in the next couple days and she said let's talk now, I called you because I have time now. So I told her I thought when she spoke to me she had an underlying anger, she agreed, she is angry. She is angry that the kids had the last couple years of their life taken from them, she is angry that she is linked to me financially and she sees that as a liability, she was mad she let me speak for her in financial matters (she NEVER wanted anything to do with the money or paying bills etc) , she was mad the she didn't have a voice, she was mad that she was afraid of the government and courts, she was mad that I had paid more attention to and tried to sleep with her friend.

Toward the end of the call she said she forgave me for all the other things, but the thing with her friend (which I actually felt she HAS forgiven me for, she never really mentions it anymore and she used to mention it every time I talked to her from jail until I apologized) she was still angry about. She says she HAS forgiven me but it will take her a long time to get over the anger. The thing is, she told me just before trial about two years ago, that she loved me as much as the day she married me, and she told me she never would have left me if we didn't have the trial, so I am not sure she is telling me the truth. I have in my mind to tell her everything that has gone on between me and her friend, which isn't very much or damaging I think. I think it is best to come clean, repent and ask for forgiveness. I think she may actually think I slept with the girl, which is not the case. Any thoughts anyone?

I took responsibility for all of it and validated her feelings, and it seemed to be a good thing. I pushed back on one little thing, which was a mistake that I will learn from. But overall I felt it went well. Thanks for listening!

Thanks!