Jim0987 #9 - Blackholes, cats and overanalysis

[edz]

I tend to agree with you BTW re the spew reflecting her feelings. I think to “believe half of what they say, and only half of what they do” is designed to protect OUR feelings to ensure we can carry on. There’s a noble goal there but I think we do need to be careful not to be dismissive of their feelings, however impacted they are by the chemicals of infatuation, alien juice, etc.

Good point there, no OM in my sitch (again always add that I know of) but w has always bottled everything up and then exploded, BD was the grand finale (so far) of that behaviour. I think thats why the "believe" is balanced out by validation (theres a good cheat sheet on that stickied somewhere in newcomers I believe). Now all I need to do is actually get my w to talk about - anything - related to the m or r on her own behalf and not just leave things as they are and focus entirely on my s's diary.