It seems like all the DBing is just back firing right now. Over the last week I have committed more to the LRT, and following Sandi rules. I've been met with even more talk of moving out, lawyers, the divorce process, and her increased engagement with the OM. Am I doing something wrong here? Or is this part of the process. I have read through the forum and it appears that this seems to happen in a lot of other people's sitch.
I'm sorry Andy, i can definitely see how rough that is for you when you are trying your hardest but it seems to have the opposite effect. The only thing I can say is, do you think you would get a better result if you fought your W tooth and nail over this? I know this is something very difficult to come to terms with, and I won't pretend like I get it, but by trusting the process, you give yourself a chance. Fighting your W, will only increase her desire to keep going down the path because you will appear like you are trying to control her and her life/decisions.
However you can, convey that you don't like and don't agree with her choice, that its not something you want, but you won't stand in her way. The only way I know to do this is by just being light and friendly to her, at least for things not concerning OM.
Again, ask yourself if you did the opposite of what you are doing and fought your W on it, would it have better results or worse?
Things will turn around Andy, just trust the process. Read success stories. Almost all of them involve OM/OW and R didnt happen for 1-3 years!
ME: 28 W: 24 M: 2.5yrs T: 5yrs BD: 22 SEP 14 W Leaves: 5 OCT 14
