Had a nice day today. My oldest friend (from uni) came for a visit with her 7 year old son. They hadn't seen the flat before and were very excited. We had some lunch and some good laughs. She got the sitch update.
I took them off to the bookshop where I volunteer and we chose some books for her little boy. He was very excited. Then they came back to mine and he cristened my loo with a large...well, I'll leave that to your imagination! Needless to say he was very pleased about that!
I was thinking this morning about MWDs 4 chapters towards the end of DR - on infidelity, MLC, depression and passion meltdown. Thinking about our sitch, there are elements of all of these, and I guess I get a bit confused sometimes about where to focus.
I still wonder whether my H might be in MLC. He has done some of the classic stuff - lost a pile of weight, got some new clothes, became generally dissatisfied with life.
But he has also said to me he thinks he's been struggling with depression for the last few years. That he felt a big hole of loneliness right in the middle of his heart - not from our marriage as such but from working away and the amount of time he spent alone.
Plus he also has an OW - and he has said to me he felt some of the spark went out of ML and if became a bit 'perfunctory.'
So, I read these chapters and think - we have some of all of this...does anyone else feel this, and how do I get a bit more clarity about 'primary cause' in my own mind...or it it just time will tell?
Settled in my cosy flat for the evening now - no GAL tonight....just me, the ipad and a glass of wine ;-)
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
