The biggest question on my mind remains if WAW is capable of putting in the work to build a strong M right now. I don't intend to find the answer soon. And I know you said it's not really my place to decide, but it kind of is. That is the primary factor in our chances to successfully reconcile. I don't want to judge her, or declare her worthy/unworthy (I already believe she is worthy). But I feel like I do have to decide for myself if she is still a woman I can build a M with. What do you think? Unfair?
I'm gonna throw you a curve, you don't know if you're capable of the work it takes to build a strong M. That's not a 2x4, it's just the truth. None of us knows that, we just move forward on faith and willingness to try. No expectations. Really.
I can tell you, as I often say on my thread, it's no cakewalk and it's not just like being married in the good days before BD. It's a very new entity and there are landmines all along the path.
It's work. Yes, there's a honeymoon phase in the beginning but it does end and then it's all the stresses of everyday life, Rs, along with ghosts of the past, if you let them in.
It's important to decide if you want this person in your life. You're looking at a life partner through a very different lens now, with new insights and perspectives.
But you'll never know if either of you is up to it until you get there.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
