Devastated Husband; Need Advice...Part 2

[Mozza]

You would benefit from reading "The 5 love languages" by Gary Chapman. It's often mentioned around here.

It's a book about the different ways in which we communicate about love, especially how we say and understand that we're loved. In your case, it looks like you spoke a language (acts of service) that was not the primary language of your W. She seems to expect "words of affirmation" based on your recent posts. For a better answer, you'll need to read the book and draw your own conclusions.

It's not necessarily a book about stopping your D, but it can be useful. Mostly, it's a book to become more mature as a spouse and it will help you regardless of what happens with your W.