Can I eat fish on Fridays during Lent?

[holdingon]

Betsey,
Do you mean you want to have an R talk with a sane, rational, human being? Or, do you want to have an R talk with your alien, Bob, occasionally there H? Having just had an R talk with my still alien H, I must say very little was gleaned from the conversation... except for him to tell me how "happy" he is... something I did not need to hear, oh, and the ever present "if we D" conversation.

Do you really expect him to say ANYTHING different from what he has said in the past??? And if he wanted to, wouldn't he? If you want validation that this sucks, well, it does.

Interesting that we have given ourselves "deadlines". Could it be that the deadlines are what are "fueling our fire?"

I wonder about this. Of course, a deadline is fine... but what does it really mean to you? Sanity? or now desperation?

Yes, I found myself praying for some insight to the end of my sitch, too. But the reality is I've invested a lot of time here... and still I have no answers. Our timelines are so out-of-synch with theirs, it is excrutiating...

Yes, it would be fair to have an R talk... but think about what you want from it and what are the chances you will actually get it? If you are wanting to give an ultimatum, well, you will have to be ready for either outcome there, too.

We ALL want wonderful, loving companionship... and in reality, we all want it with our H's. It sucks, sucks, sucks.

Can you use this waiting time??? Can you use it as a resting time, a rejuvenating time? Can you "move on" in your head? Can you put your R away for now?

If you truly feel you have given both H and the R all the time allotted, that is up to you, the big question. Maybe instead of an R talk, a list of "where I am" might be better. Only you know.

My H appeared yesterday... and I am plagued with questions.. why is he so calm, thoughtful, nice? And if he is going to be those things does is mean he is on the way back or content with his decision to be on the way out for good? But those thoughts just lead to craziness. Better to appreciate the real H being there, and not drunk and agitated like he was a few months ago.

Hang in there, Bruce.