Lou - you are so brave and starting the year off with such clarity. I don't think you are giving yourself enough credit for just having the determination to reboot your life. I mean this is early days and you are not letting H's choices define your life.
You haven't been home in 8 years. Even without all the personal upheaval, gaining your footing after 8 years is going to take some time. Be kind to yourself and know you have lots of support here.
You are just getting started on this new path but your attitude is going to help you make great strides in this new year. {{{hugs}}}}
M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters BD: 5/14 Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW D Final 9/17
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ― Maya Angelou