What happens when you tell someone not to watch a movie? You realize I'm probably going to waste money and more time by renting these at Blockbuster on Saturday! I have been making it a habit of renting them after church...
To all who care, I've sort of been keeping in the theme of really inane comedies--Happy Gilmore, The Animal, you get the idea. This past week's selection included "Paaaat, The Movie."
Yes, it was beyond stupid. D10 watched it with me. I asked her (knowing the answer) if you ever got to find out if Pat was a woman or a man by the end? She chirped with a smile, "Nope, but my money is on Chris as the man and Pat as the woman--strange as that might be."
Two more movies which we haven't seen--maybe we'll plug in tonight. Oh, I forgot, I'm supposed to head to Triple J's for Jamaican Jerk Chicken. Triple J, do you do carryout?
Additional side note: We've noticed that all the former SNL folks are in each other's movies: Adam Sandler, Norm MacDonald, Eddie Murphy, Rob Schneider, Kevin Nealon, Julia Sweeney--they all have incestuous roles in each others' films... check out the credits at the end of the movie, cuz you'll be surprised.
Ocean journaling:
I was just about to pick up the phone to call the principal of D7's school to discuss a big summer school vs summer camp brou-ha-ha--she left a message for me to call her yesterday.... when Mr. Wonderful called.
I was annoyed--not with him, but for the fact that I was just picking the handset up to dial, not to chat. But I quickly tamped down my irritation (it was invisible to him and almost to me because I realize I want to keep wearing my DB tiara)...
MW: You guessed it: Bob showed up! "HEY, how's it going? Just checking in!"
Note to self: at least he didn't say 'how's it hanging' like some people do. Contrary to popular belief, I do not have balls that drag on the ground!
Me: "Oh, hi, Mr. W. I was just getting ready to call Mrs. R."
MW: "Oh, about the summer crap, right?
Me: "Yes, I definitely need her help resolving our dilemma."
MW: "You going to tell her you didn't appreciate being the messenger that got shot?"
Me: "Well, yes, that will probably be where I start. Anyway, I'll let you know what she has to say afterward. What's up?"
MW: "Nuthin. Just wanted to call and say hi. Any word from D10?"
Me: "No."
MW: "That means she's having fun. Good! Do you think you need me to pick her up for gymnastics?"
Me: "No, I don't know yet. Hey, would you entertain taking her to the dermatologist tomorrow morning instead?"
MW: "Dermatologist? There's nothing wrong with her skin!"
Me: "Uh, no. But she's seeing him for the plantar wart. This should be her last appointment and it will take 10 minutes. I have 3 days in a row where I either leave work early or get in late. I could really use help on one of them."
MW: "What's the 3rd day? Is that an option?
Me: "Monday, and not unless you want to lead the Girl Scout meeting on Monday afternoon. I'm working on the Being My Best badge. You want to do that?"
MW: "NO! Are you kidding?"
Me: "Yes, K, I'm kidding. Your choices to help are today's gymnastics run or tomorrow's dermatologist appointment. Either one of them are inconvenient as hell for both of us, so either one of them will help me out."
MW: Pause.
Me: "Mr. W., we don't have to resolve this right now. Think about it. And if you come up with a plan before I talk to D10 or S, feel free to call me."
MW: "Good idea!"
I really am a rocket scientist at heart.
Me: "Okay, talk to you soon!"
MW: "Okay, ciao for now." (That's his sign off to everyone and I stole it a long time ago cuz it flows nicely.)
Bob was present the entire time on his end. It still creeps me out a bit knowing he's sharing my secret... sort of... cuz he really doesn't understand that he's BEING Bob!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Quote: What happens when you tell someone not to watch a movie? You realize I'm probably going to waste money and more time by renting these at Blockbuster on Saturday! I have been making it a habit of renting them after church...
Hmmm...this is NOT one you should watch with D10, and I am WARNING you, Bets...I do NOT want to hear it when you are completely appalled by the absolutely perverted humor in it! I wash my hands of responsibility.
Note to self: at least he didn't say 'how's it hanging' like some people do. Contrary to popular belief, I do not have balls that drag on the ground!
You don't? I always thought you had some serious cajones, Betsey.
Bob was present the entire time on his end. It still creeps me out a bit knowing he's sharing my secret... sort of... cuz he really doesn't understand that he's BEING Bob!
And can you imagine even attempting to explain it to him? Yeah, right. It sounds like he's really serious about this helping out thing - just remember not to get too hung up on which one he helps with - he will prolly run if he's afraid that he's going to get eaten if he does the wrong thing!
Bust out the Bob, Betsey!
Hugs,
Myrrh
One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.
Ok, JSTX, you convinced me easily not to waste time or money on Cabin Fever. I hate gore for the sake of gore. Too much gore in life anyway... which is why I tend to rent really stupid comedies. Or love stories. Or a good mystery now and again. Or anything that takes my mind off of me and my life...
Not very discriminating, eh?
I think it should be really obvious that I have done little to no work today. I'll admit that I was slammin & jammin earlier in the week, but today, I'm a pitiful example of an employee.
Oh, and Mer, our former employee (the one we had to fire when you were doing the same) has appealed his UI appeal. His grounds are lies.... which means that the hearing will be a really fun time. Stay tuned in another week.
TTFN
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Did Bob wander to KY? D was cracking jokes and cutting up some a bit this morning and then a few minutes ago he asked me if I was crazymaking? Then he asked if he got it right?
When I told him he got it EXACTLY right he was very pleased with himself!
OK, Bob is definitely in KY!!!! With the last 3 messages I just got in a row he has to be.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Pam--You're making ME laugh! I think Bob was in Missouri yesterday (visiting Pattie) so it's very likely he made it to KY today! He's quite the traveler, you know.
Be nice to him and you'll reap his rewards tenfold!!!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Ok, I was the underproductive employee yesterday and I'm only semiunderproductive today. Maybe I could build an acronymn for that UPE and SUPE? Add it to the newcomers area! Ha.
As for Van Wilder, great movie, I liked it but I like crude humor. Super Troopers? Funny. Will Ferrell, the best. Saw Jerry MacGuire on TV the other night, the scene at the end when he comes home and is looking for his WIFE was amazing, I almost cried. Ok I lied, I did cry.
As for the Chinese Lady, I'll teach you a swear phrase "Ta Ma Da Tow" say it fast, like it was one phrase. Maybe MW will ask you what the heck did you just say? You can repeat it so he gets it. It directly translates into Her Mother's Head, but thats not what it REALLY MEANS. I think you guys know. Maybe it will add some mystery? Caution, maybe volatile if stirred!
Meow then! I'm sorry - I just couldn't resist. My H and I's R started because he took me to a movie full of crude humor and I laughed until I almost wet my pants. That apparently convinced him I was the woman for him. We watched Van Wilder for the first time on my b-day. It was the best!
One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.
Jeez, Seattle, I'm pretty good at these types of riddles, but you have me stumped.
And guess what else? I didn't fall off a turnip truck either....
The last time I took someone's advice for saying something in a foreign language, I had 3 guys chasing me for months. Story: I was on a bowling league when I lived in CA (this was my first date with Mr. W. BTW). I was the league secretary, and we had a team of guys who spoke absolutely no English.
I had 8 years of Spanish, but I don't think they wanted to discuss hair color or eating utensils with me... or Spanish literature either. My wacko neighbor was on my team--she was originally from Nicaragua and funny as hell.
One of the guys wanted to have a convo with me, and she offered to be a translator. (We were in the middle of frames, so I figure that chit chat was okay.) I said what she told me to say.... The next thing I knew, he had me in a liplock and was feeling my butt.
I whacked him good (I think we were supposedly talking about the 49ers) and he looked stunned. There stood my friend, having a cow in fits of laughter. Oddly enough, he took the whacking as some sort of sick invitation for pursuit. I spent the next few months beating him off with a stick....
Until a few months later, when my friend finally admitted to him what I had really said. He apologized on his knees (I knew that one). He spent the rest of our season walking around me with a red face... I found out that I had told him that I was a prostitute who had a thing for construction workers and would sleep with him for free...
NO WAY!!!!! I'M NOT GOING TO FALL FOR THAT AGAIN!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
You don't? I always thought you had some serious cajones, Betsey.
