Your w and my XH sound very similar. XH refuses to take any responsibility. He just wants to keep throwing in my face how good he is being to me. Ugh! Could I have been a better wife? Absolutely! But apparently he doesn't realize that's a two-way street.
Sorry to high jack your post but just wanted to say I sympathize with your sitch. Best wishes for a wonderful new year!
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids