Thanks for note- i've been sooooo busy constantly- i haven't even remembered the computer. it is just like "work" to me- sitting in front of a screen - which is what one does in an office these days. i just forget it exists when i'm really really busy.
we finished up in fl and headed to nj like 19th - arrived 20th - undecorated halloween decorations and put up some christmas - enough to make it fun (tree , etc) but not the usual all out. too much work for a couple days. cooked, cleaned and cooked christmas day feast - and like you- it's a amll group here now. my cousin & his wife (and two kids) and my nephew wereall late by about an hour- and it was great. my sister, neice, h & I sat down to a quiet and really quite nice dinner- then everyone wantedered in and ate too, visited, it ws really nicer i think than usual- so what the heck??? ya never know, do you.??
soooo- all in all a nice little holiday and notmuch stress or worry- so good for me.
i guess i'm adjusting - i like it when you say you see a difference. some days i do, some not too much- always tho "in general" in the background of my thoughts, feelings, etc.
i guess we all just morph whether we see it or fee it or what - all the time also i guess - so hoping it's all good.
he leaves tomorrow morning- it's a wierd thing - me and this sitch. i have no idea really what i'm doing (REALLY) - I can see the good things he does, i can appreciate good things- problem is that when i see the less than great things- i now don't make excuses and am forced pretty much to see them for what they are (selfish, whatever). it's not global or a problem really- but it's sad-ish to be all clinical and honest with self and so on.
seems shabby sometimes- it's soooo my habit to 'see the good side". ya gotta wonder where the chips will fall.
i honestly don't know- i am pretty tired of not having more love and affection in my life- but then realize who does necessarily and i've still got it alot better than most.
this being reasonable stuff really kind of steadys the boat all the time and maybe that's not so good either.
oh well- no tghinking - it's a policy still. the weather was lovely over christmas and i feel guilty still not wanting snow imemediately- but it makes me go out in the garden and tidy up a bit and that's great.
ta da- who knows, maybe i'll get those four bags of mulch actually spread around instead of piled in the yard!!@!@
hop[pe springs eternal. you sound great- so i'm glad of it- and glad your holiday was nice. hope christmas was too and that the new year is a great one for us all- xxo
