Requesting support and direction

[TLEE86]

Andy, like Bell said. Boundaries. I struggle with this all the time. Mine is financial. I finally had the balls to say something about it today and now I have to enforce it. Heres what my DB coach told me about boundaries in case you didn't read it on my thread.

For me (Lovingly and kindly enforce that boundary of finances)- W, I will help you and I am here for YOU but i don't want to be in the position to help you AND HIM. I will not pay for his bills. Convey to her that I will help her out, and do what I can to help HER but draw the line to where it is not going to OM

For you (WRT texting OM in front of you)- W, although I do not support your decision to talk to OM, that is your choice and yours to make. But please do not disrespect me by continuing to text OM while we are at dinner. If you continue to do this, I will not sit here with you.

Something like that maybe? When I set mine, it wasn't so clear cut, but as long as the message gets across that you won't tolerate things, not because you don't love them, but because its just that line in the sand you are drawing.

How are you doing on identifying that void that you aren't/did not fill in your M? I think you really need to dial in on this one...