My waking nightmare

[Lorelai]

Calibri, Wonka, BklynMom, GB, thank you for posting on my thread around the holidays. I haven't had much time to post, but I have been reading. Your advice and insight was extremely helpful. Christmas Eve went better than I expected. H came to get the kids in the afternoon and after I kissed them goodbye I went into the kitchen and busied myself as they headed out the door and drove away. Then I started crying. But I dried my eyes, grabbed my keys and went to the salon for a very lovely pedicure, then picked up takeout at one of my favorite upscale Chinese restaurants. I took advantage of the time while the kids were out and wrapped all the gifts and hid them in the bedroom so H and I could bring them out after the kids were in bed so it would look like Santa had come in the morning.
H stayed over so he could be here Christmas morning. The kids had a great time and I made an egg dish for breakfast/brunch which he complimented me on. In the afternoon he stayed at the house while I took the kids to his mom's to have Christmas with her. She had wanted us to come without H so we could have our own Christmas with her since I didn't go to Christmas Eve. It was a very nice day. When we got home I was exhausted and I asked H if we could go into the bedroom where I gently put my hand on his shoulder and asked if he could stay another night because I was so tired and I could really use the extra help. He said yes and then went into the kitchen and made the kids dinner, which helped a ton and I told him so, hugging him. He hugged me back. After the kids went to bed we watched a documentary together, something we always used to love doing. We sat on the couch together and I rubbed his back and then, surprisingly, halfway through the movie he started stroking my head. It felt so good to be touched like that by him. After the movie I went to bed in our room and he stayed on the couch again.
I have more to post. Thought H was softening big time, but today was horrible. I will write more later. I'm so tired and hoping to get a good night's sleep tonight so I can take the little ones to a kids' new year's eve event during the day, then taking S4 with me to a friend's house in the city for a NYE sleepover/playdate in the evening. More later!