H's MLC#6- Now its about ME!

[2BHappy]

Job Yes I know I need to step WAY back for a long while.

One other thing my H brought up is how I use to speak to him and about him in front of and with others...so I ask my BFF and my mom and that both agreed, my mom said that somethings I said to or about him in front of her made her feel very bad for him and upset with me that I was treating my H that way:(

My BFF tells me at times she thought I never really loved my H:(

WHen H mentioned this peice of info he was just venting out everything, like I said he has not talked this much about his feelings EVER.

I know I still have alot of work to do on ME, I don't want to treat anyone badly, I think I know why I acted that way and said certain things, my focus will be to learn how to better express myself going forward.

I have learned that this DB is helping me, praying is helping me be a better ME.

I did not tell H I will give him time, but I will. I let him know that IF he wanted to leave I would support his leaving and we would always be friends and great co parents.

I need to let him go while he is here, I got work to do on myself and I will use the gift of time.

I'm spending today reading DR.

I noticed that I have not been attending Church regulary like I was and I need this, I need that peacefulness that I get from started my week of in Church.

H did say he was sorry for the things he did wrong to and in our relationship, this is also something I have not heard in a very long time.

H told me I can check his cell/email if I wanted to. I really wanted to but I declined, not sure why I said no, but I did...

Time I need more time myself, more time to really figure out what I want WITHOUT being on an emotional roller coaster at the same time.

I know I need to pray thru negative thoughts and emotions.

JOB, thank you for continue to take the time to tell me the same thing in different ways, I hear you, but its sometimes hard to take action.