The holidays are tough on everyone, I wouldn't jump to conclusions. There's a saying around here, don't frighten the squirrel. (if a little squirrel gets brave enough to come close to you, don't make any sudden moves and scare it away.)

Did your wife have postpartum depression? If so was she treated? She's gone through a lot of trauma in the last 4 years. Does she see an IC?

I did read your first post and a couple since then. You have a good handle on you and what you can control. Keep that in the forefront.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss